If you could have invented one thing, what would it have been?

eBay.

Ask me anything

If you could have a super power, what would it be?

The ability to Quicksave and Quickload real life.

Ask me anything

“…is a kiss from a sleeping child.”

Corafus wrote:
“I hate to let my extremist side show, but I want them to get more than caught. I want to brutally torture and kill them in a public display. And not just them, all who are biologically related to them. The theft gene needs to be exterminated.”


This. This. Exactly this. Well, perhaps not the extreme prejudice part, but definitely the brutal torture. My mother came to me as I lay listening to Happy Hardcore. I don’t why I lay listening to that trash, but I found a CD of it in my Dad’s car after my brother–in–law borrowed it. I liked one of the tracks on it. Well, the start.

Aaaaaaaaaaaanyhoo, my mother came into the room. I asked: “Wassup?”, to which she replied: “Nothing.” Then sat down next to me and burst into tears. Yes, folks, not all muslims burst in explosions of flames, burnt meat and bits of grenade.

The cops had, apparently, told her today that they were closing the case as they couldn’t take it any further. They couldn’t do jack with the fingerprint they found.

It broke my mother’s heart.

She was literally wracked with sobs. I’ve encountered that phrase before but only understood it now. It was awful. I didn’t know what to do or say, so I hugged her tight and kept kissing her tear–streaked face. Between sobs she cried out about what had happened, and asked how allah could do this. What lesson could it possibly have intended? “They’ve taken everything!” she cried, referring to all the memories associated with the huge amounts of money the jewellery was worth. The last remaining memorabilia of her long deceased parents, expensive things my father gave her on their wedding, sets she wanted to give my sister when she gets married. Every fucking thing.

I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t exactly tell her allah did nothing because allah doesn’t exist, could I? So I said nothing and carried on hugging her. Eventually I spoke about how lucky it was that we hadn’t walked in on them robbing the place — we would have had my sister not suggested going to my other sister’s house after our trip back from the restaurant — we would have gotten beaten down by the robbers as they tried to make their escape. Perhaps they would have killed my parents by bashing them over the head with the safety deposit box whilst trying to open up an escape route.

So eventually my mother concluded allah may have wanted to ‘save’ us, ‘save’ our lives. Pretty sadistic way to do it, though I never voiced that thought.

She’s ok for the moment, but it’s almost like she’s grieving as though experiencing a bereavement. Ultra–harsh.

“The only thing worth stealing…”

Last night, my parents, my youngest sister and I went out to a restaurant for my sister’s birthday anniversary. She had come up from London for a couple of weeks, you see. We had some fun, then went to my other sister’s house to play with her son, and have a cuppa. When we returned home I went into the kitchen and noticed that the back door was open.

My father started shouting that someone had left it open, even though I had seen him walk out of the kitchen, and he very meticulously checks that all windows and doors remain locked prior to leaving his house. As my sister went to close the door, I suddenly saw that the lock outside had snapped off.

“We’ve been robbed!” I yelled, and ran back to the main room: TV and video still intact. Hmmm… Strange. I pegged it into the sitting room: computer and monitor still there. Nothing touched. Strange. Then I went upstairs.

There it was. My parents’ room an absolute shambles. They’ve emptied the cupboards and nicked my mum’s jewellery! It’s as if they’d known they’d find something there. Weird thing? My mum had fairly recently taken the jewellery out of the bank in safety deposit box. I know, because I had accompanied her to do it. Turns out the solid, 24–carat gold jewellery amounts to approximately £18,600. With the £845 in cash they also took, they got a motherfucking good haul.

My parents don’t usually have large amounts of cash or jewellery at home, so we suspected something dodgy afoot. The cops, however, don’t seem to think so. They suspect Asian burglars who know that Asians invariably keep jewellery upstairs. We simply happened to have taken that stuff out of the bank at a bad time, sighs abound.

For my mother it all has sentimental value too: she had a lot of the stuff since her wedding (more than 35 years ago now), and wanted to pass items on to my youngest sister when she eventually gets married. My mother felt absolutely distraught. My mind can’t even comprehend that we’ve had close to ￡20,000 stolen from us!

I keep thinking about what my mother must have felt seeing the room in its devastated state. That palpable horror which accompanies the dawning realisation that one of your worst nightmares has come true. For me, I felt impotent rage that some cunting SHIT scumbags could have the audacity to violate the sanctity of their home and steal what took my parents DECADES to build.

Purexed